Narcissism & Narcissists Frequently Asked Questions
Narcissism is an epidemic society problem that creates severe damage and loss of self on all levels. Education regarding narcissism is globally necessary, to promote awareness of this serious personality condition which regularly rips people’s lives apart. We sincerely hope these questions and answers grant you empowered knowledge in regard to narcissism.
What is narcissism?
There are two types of narcissism. Healthy narcissism and unhealthy narcissism. Healthy narcissism is a state of ensuring one’s needs are met without affecting one’s environment and other people in adverse ways. Healthy narcissism is a constructive assertion of self, and mature utilisation of decision making processes. Unhealthy narcissism is a state of trying to get one’s needs met in ways that are detrimental to one’s environment and other individuals. Unhealthy narcissism is a destructive assertion of self and immature utilisation of decision making processes. Extreme narcissism is known as NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder).
What are the symptoms of narcissism?
The symptoms are numerous. The most common being:
How common is narcissism?
“Narcissism is disturbingly common, My belief is that narcissism at the level of NPD could be as high as 16% of the population. The number of contacts I receive daily in regard to narcissism are numerous, and the symptoms that are described are totally consistent with high-level narcissism. Every one of us knows a narcissist, or someone that has suffered abuse at the hands of a narcissist.” ~ Melanie Tonia Evans.
Can men and women be narcissistic?
Yes, both sexes produce NPD’s. Generally narcissistic males create more wide-spread damage due to the tendency of women to cling to narcissistic relationships whilst trying to fix them. The average male is far better equipped to leave a narcissistic female once her ‘glamour’ wears off and the narcissistic personality and insecure and immature behaviour emerges. Narcissistic men are also more likely to act out violence, pathological jealous and rage, which can be extremely dangerous for women.
What damage does a narcissist do?
The myth of vampires was modelled on unhealthy narcissism. Narcissists commonly terrorise people, suck them dry and leave them in advanced and psychotic states of co-dependency, relationship addiction and severe mental, emotional, physical, spiritual and financial disintegration. The experience of being violated and abused by a narcissist is one of the most horrific ordeals that any individual could ever participate in. A powerful addiction experience takes place (being addicted to the narcissist), which is very difficult to break free of unless specific healing procedures are engaged in. Many individuals never recover from the effects of narcissistic abuse, and this is why prevention and substantial healing practices are very necessary in order to minimise and heal narcissistic damage.
Is narcissism curable?
“I wish I could say ‘yes’. I believe that individuals with narcissistic tendencies can in fact apply humility, do self-development work and take responsibility for their insecurities, defence mechanisms and heal. I’ve never personally came across a true NPD character that could remain in humility and truth for long enough to do the necessary work to stop projecting their darkness and pain onto life and others. The pathological aspect of NPD creates a profound lack of accountability, empathy and conscience, as well as a fabricated false self that truly doesn’t think and operate in ways that are logical, real or humane. The true narcissist has created such a fantasy image of themselves as a means of defence, that they can’t seem to assimilate truth or healthy behaviours. Accountability and truth feels to the narcissist like the ultimate vulnerability which will leave him or her susceptible to emotional and identity annihilation. In my experience the true narcissist will avoid becoming ‘real’ at all costs, regardless of the losses he or she may incur.” ~ Melanie Tonia Evans.
Can a relationship be sustained with a narcissist?
Yes sometimes a relationship can be sustained with a narcissist, but it’s impossible to experience a healthy and safe relationship with a narcissist. A narcissist has modelled life as ‘all about him or her’, and views other people as objects through which to gain narcissistic supply, or to set up as the scapegoat to avoid accountability by blaming this person. Narcissists are masters at violating boundaries, and have no respect for your emotional, mental, physical, spiritual or financial space. The best relationship to have with an NPD is no relationship. Narcissists are often ‘poisonous’, and once they’ve violated your space, can easily find the mark in order to do so again. The best defence against a narcissistic relationship is moving on, and totally enforced boundaries; even calling on intervention by authorities if necessary. A life with a narcissist, no matter how strong you are, will feel like you’re losing your mind, walking on broken glass and creates your isolation, and the experience of your entire world turning against you. If you suspect you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, conditions won’t improve until you pull away and start taking responsibility by empowering yourself.
What should I do if I’m in a relationship with a narcissist?
The healing and the empowering of you is vital if you’re going to ‘get off the hook’ and create a healthy, loving and safe life. I suggest seeking Quanta Freedom™ Healing and my journalling program Empowered Self in conjunction as soon as possible in order to start breaking away from the abuse in order to recover yourself
What is the gift of narcissistic abuse?
Sadly, many people don’t realise that the ‘signal’ of narcissistic abuse is a calling to a ‘new you’. You’ve suffered enormous violations and the torturing of your soul, and the last thing you may feel like doing is recognising what happened to you as’ a gift’. The truth of the matter is, when you can recognise and embrace that you’ve been co-dependent and had poor boundary function, you can take responsibility for your own healing. This then starts shifting you out of being a victim into an evolving conscious being. Narcissistic abuse is a ‘make or break’ deal. You’ll remain shell-shocked, or you’ll liberate yourself to a new empowerment that you couldn’t imagine, even before your narcissistic experience. The individuals who heal from narcissistic abuse have exceptional acceptance and love of self and personal power, and they experience profound and durable happiness and peace. No longer do they give themselves away to others and life, or hold others responsible for providing them with their own sense of self. Recovery from narcissistic abuse offers the ultimate opportunity for incredible personal growth and transformation.
Read about how to identify and recover from narcissistic abuse in Melanie’s eBook,
"How to Recognise and Heal from Narcissistic Abuse"
We hope you've received some answers to your questions about Narcissism.
If you have a question which wasn't answered here, please ask your Narcissism question here.
Self Empowerment Articles
Men In Love Relationships
NPD 101 Quiz
Online Store - Home
Melanie's Books - Home
- Breaking the Chains Of Painful Love
- Take Back Your Power
Programs & Services Home
- Quanta Freedom™ Healing
- Quanta Freedom™ Healing Philosophy
- Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program
eBooks - Home
- Claim Your True Self eBooks
- Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse eBooks
- Create Real Love eBooks
- Unlock the Power Within You eBooks
eCourses - Home
- Empowered Self eCourse
- Empowered Love Creation eCourse
- Empowered Living eCourse
New Life Newsletter
Empowered Love & Life Newsletter
Empowered Relationships Blog
Empowered Love Radio
Melanie on Facebook
Melanie on Twitter
Melanie on Youtube