Men in Painful Love Relationships

Men are victims of painful love too

Even though this site has been constructed specifically for women, we humbly acknowledge that the devastation of painful love also affects men, both straight and gay. The men that Melanie works with in relation to healing painful love circumstances are:

1. Men who have been abusive in relationships who wish to take responsibility and heal, and
2. Men who have suffered abusive and narcissistic partners and / or parents.

There are men who have been inappropriate partners who wish to work on themselves in order to create happier and healthier relationships and wish to do this for themselves as well as their partners. If you know that you’ve been abusive and have reached a place in your life where you know that your defense mechanisms, fears, aggression and reactions are not serving you anymore, please contact Melanie and she’ll be able to discuss with you your needs, prognosis and recovery recommendations. There is hope for you and the people that you love!

In relation to men that have been abused in relationships, generally, men have a better ability to pull away from women who are pathological liars, jealous, insecure, emotionally high-maintenance and demanding control freaks. However, love can be incredibly confusing, especially with a narcissistic partner who created the 'glamour' of the perfect partner and the perfect relationship quickly and expertly at the beginning of the relationship. This 'ideal' can be very hard to let go of.

Do you feel trapped and tormented in your narcissistic relationship?

Men as well as women can feel tormented, anguished and trapped in narcissistic relationships. One minute the narcissistic partner appears to love you, and convinces you that there is hope, and the next they are destroying your self-confidence and self-belief on a devastating number of levels. Due to the narcissist’s expert projections, you might even be convinced that the problems in the relationship are your fault. Maybe you have financial and personal investments tied up the relationship. Maybe you have children with the narcissist.

When the stakes are high, the losses may feel insurmountable and you may be hanging on for dear life for a variety of reasons. Even after separating willingly or unwillingly from a narcissistic partner, the torment and soul-destroying thoughts and emotions as a result of the selfishness, entitlements, lies and manipulations of the narcissist, can continue for a long time.

Whilst it’s a rare incident for a man to be as physically threatened by a woman, it does happen and it’s even more isolating for men who often don’t have the close supportive networks that females do. For gay men, violence at the hands of a narcissist can be very real. The narcissist knows your weak spots and will use these against you in threatening and demeaning ways, whether it be financial, emotional or physical.

We all know that the scarring from mental and emotional abuse is just as bad as physical abuse, and as a man it’s often hard to allow or receive the necessary support for these wounds. It’s only nice guys that end up with narcissists, and if you’ve endured a narcissistic relationship it’s because the narcissist knew that you were a 'full' resource to mine for their needs.

When you’ve 'tried everything' to make it work...

Men can find it excruciatingly painful in a relationship with a narcissist, because there’s no way to make the narcissist consistently happy or appeased – it’s a bottomless pit of expectations and demands that are impossible to satisfy.  

Great guys want to know they’re doing a good job of making their partner feel loved, cherished and happy; an impossibility in a relationship with a narcissist, because you’re damned if you do and you’re damned if you don’t.

There is help

If you are a male reading the information on this site, accessing articles, eBooks, eCourses or Books, please realise the information is also relevant to you. In regard to the information regarding narcissism... yes most definitely female narcissists do exist.

In this instance please understand that we don't mean to exclude or underestimate the damage that is done by females. Therefore, substitute 'he' for 'she' throughout the site. you'll certainly relate to the dynamics of narcissism, as the behaviour and symptoms are not gender-specific.

Please know that the healing procedures and recovery from narcissistic abuse that Melanie Tonia Evans facilitates is as equally effective for men as it is for women.

What men have to say about Melanie's services...

Men, if you require assistance and information, feel free to contact Melanie.