By Committing To NARP I Paved The Way For An Abuse Free Life For My 2 Young Daughters
Location: New Zealand
My Thriver Story
I was 22 years old, not long out of a string of relationships in which I was not being my authentic self and oh so lonely, when I met the man I thought must be my forever guy. I was completely and utterly love bombed and believing we had so much in common, that he must be my Soul Mate.
He tested my loyalty increasingly by divulging unacceptable behavior, but I admired the honesty and drive to do things differently with me.
Being a people pleaser and thinking I was on this earth to fix others I, of course, was super understanding and supportive. Not realizing I was in fact setting the bar low for future behavior and screaming that I relied on love from an outside source.
Within 6 months I was pregnant, engaged and shifting back to my hometown where he had been given a job as a farm hand. Our place was isolated with no internet or cell coverage, and I spent most of my days stranded as he would use my car to go to work.
Over the course of our short relationship, I put up with moodiness, being ignored, used for sex, rejected when I wanted intimacy, arguments that led to screaming, cursing and things being broken, stealing my money, buying and using drugs with and without my knowledge, gaslighting, crazy making, dissing my friends and family and eventually physical abuse.
And, though it has taken me a lot of work to forgive myself for birthing my daughter into that toxic environment, I am so proud of myself for leaving when I did. When my daughter was about 6 months old, with the help of my family, I left and moved back in with my parents.
As many will know all too well the abuse continued despite my leaving, and when a friend mentioned narcissism, I hungrily devoured any information I could on the subject. Now I felt validated!
After 6 months my now one-year-old and I moved into a house on our own and my ex left the area. Any interaction with my ex led to hours of talk therapy and analyzing. I was dabbling in what I thought was self-care, seeking solace within my religion and starting to wish for a new partner to fix my loneliness.
All the while Melanie’s work kept popping up in my late-night internet searches and I was feeling more and more called to do NARP. I had never spent that much money on anything remotely similar, I didn’t understand how it would work and was very skeptical. But I thought there would be no harm in doing the 16 day free course and free Quanta Freedom Healing webinar. I was not wrong, and I purchased NARP days later. The words spoke to me in a way nothing else had yet. I started to realize that my life hadn’t just happened TO me, it was FOR me to start becoming the real me and loving her.
I saw that my relationship with myself was so unhealthy that I actually wasn’t capable of having a healthy relationship with someone else. My inner beliefs of “I am not good enough” could only generate relationships that reinforced this.
So far I’ve identified trauma from as young as two years old. I’ve then held space for that pain, been with it and felt it rather than pushing it away, and then shifted it with Quanta Freedom Healing to make room for and accept love and light. That is the beauty of this program for me. The part that wows me the most is that once I have done this, it is gone. I don’t have to deal with that issue again and my life is genuinely changed after every shift.
I have been doing NARP when I can for over three years and have started the Empowered Self Modules with great success in the last 6 months. After only two years on my own and doing my inner work 2-5 times a week, I reconnected with my high school sweetheart and we have added another little girl to our family.
He came back into my life when I was no longer searching. Without the path I have taken I know I would not have been able to appreciate this man and accept his love. But what an amazing feeling to be able to speak my truth and be my true self around my partner without fear of rejection.
This journey has led me down a variety of other paths of growth and so many back up Melanie’s work and enhance my NARP learning. I encourage anyone relating even a tiny bit to my story to do the work! It can be hard, but it is also so liberating. With each layer of the old me shed, the real me shines easier. It was tiring to live that old life, it is not tiring to be the REAL YOU.
I now have so much gratitude for the past where I used to hold resentment. Gratitude for that relationship with the narcissist forcing me to look within and learn to love ME. Gratitude for the knowledge I now have and can teach my daughters. So maybe they will be more in tune with their intuition and know in their hearts that they are enough, because their mumma sure is.
Love and light to all!